not letting fear stop me

Two weeks ago, I was driving to meet Kelly at Lululemon to provide some enabling shopping advice. On my way, I got an email from Catherine Just. I have followed her for a while. I am enrolled in her group offering for May. I think the work she does is beautiful. Anyway, I’m sitting at a red light and I get an email.

She’s opening up 30 minute consultation spots. First come, first served. Without even thinking, I take my next right. I sit in the parking lot of Thai Orchid (Hi Toa!) and fill out the info. I snagged a spot. And I was so so excited. I have so much swimming around in my head. So much of the time, I go back and forth quickly between feeling incredibly blessed and incredibly overwhelmed. I was so looking forward to talking to her about me and my journey. Where I am emotionally, professionally, all of that stuff.

I wrote the info down in my calendar and kinda forgot about it.

I have this call in a little more than three hours. And I almost sent an email to cancel.

Why? I’m sure what I have to say isn’t interesting. I’m sure she can’t help me. I’m sure I’m just a whiny, self-absorbed person who has plenty of time to get everything done if I just dig my heels in. I think there’s something wrong with me if I don’t have all the answers myself. I need to be more self-sufficient.

I sat with my lunch and thought all of these things. I let fear take over. I let fear tell me that I didn’t deserve this call. I let fear tell me that somehow I didn’t deserve to take time out of my day to talk about myself to someone that can help me.

So basically, I let fear tell me that I don’t deserve the same service that I give others on a daily basis. A service that I am building and growing and immersing myself in. A service that I am hoping to create a career from.

Yikes.

I went to her website, hoping that just maybe I’d get some clue as to what I should do.

“Shift your perception and let go of limiting beliefs. It’s time to own your greatness.”

Okay. I heard that loud and clear.

So I’ll call her at my allotted time. And I’ll be nervous. And I’ll be afraid that I’ll spurt sentence fragments and set things on fire. I’ll be afraid she’s judging me, even though I know she isn’t. I’ll be afraid that I won’t have anything to say, even though I know the floodgates are gonna be opened up on her (poor soul).

I’ll be afraid, but I’ll do it anyway.

That’s not all I’m doing today that scares me:

I registered for a marathon today. I will be training with two of my best girls (maybe more). I am so looking forward to it, but I am also terrified. TERRIFED.

I amended the offering for #myMay. I added two email consults to the resources-only option. I just felt like I needed to be more involved than just letting participants go. I don’t know how it looks to change just two days before launch (and that “resouce only” is no longer “only” resources), but oh well. I am so very very excited about this offering. And I just want to make sure that I am truly giving my all. I’m afraid it won’t be liked or well-received. But, you know what? I’m putting it out there. I’m depending on the words of those who have worked my challenges before and believing that my work has value. (Click here if you want more info.)

I’m afraid of a lot of things right now, friends. But I’m putting my head down and taking the steps. Because without fear, I won’t accomplish great things. Right?

Right.

#mymay

I am at a point in my life where I feel constantly on the verge of overwhelm. I have been very sad for personal and community reasons. I have been very busy with the final weeks of runner training leading up to goal races. I am wrapping up my first big life coaching course. And that is just really generalizing everything. My life is full. Mostly full of great, exciting, exhilarating things, but full just the same.

As I’ve worked through these stressors and built my business, I’ve noticed something glaring. I have been neglecting myself. I haven’t been getting enough sleep. I’m not eating the way my body prefers (you should see how I retain water after the Greek truck – yikes). I’m putting miles on the road and the poses on the mat, but I’m not “training.” My house isn’t as tidy as I would like. You know the drill.

That’s exactly why I’m writing this. You know the drill. You do it too. You are there.

I know how hard it is to try to stay focused on my goals. I struggle sometimes to even keep them in the front of my mind. I spent the month of April taking some time to reflect on myself. To try to find a system of accountability that was focused but still fluid.

And I think I’ve done it.

I’ve been working my newest offering for three weeks and I have a client working it as well. It is specific but flexible, motivating but not discouraging.

And I think I love it.

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So, yes, this is a plug. A shameless plug to invite you to become a part of my latest accountability offering. To allow me to share an accountability system and a series of beautiful printables from the lovely Cassie. This, my friends, is My May.

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There are two different tiers. With registration, you will receive daily emails the first four days of May to set up realistic and meaningful daily goals for the month. I will send a weekly informational email and a new printable for each week. You will have access to a private facebook group to build community accountability. For an additional fee, you will receive accountability coaching from me 3-4 times a week via text message or email.

And a bonus? The first 5 registrants will receive a 30-minute coaching session from me. This is where I’ll really get to know you. This is my favorite part!

More information and registration details are here.

I truly hope you will join us! You can email me at Krissie@committedcoaching.com with any questions.

energy

Wow. I haven’t been here in a while.

I have so much going on, friends. So much. I can’t even begin to catch you up, so I’m just going to pick things up where I am right now.

I decided to take April “off” as far as being a coach in any fashion. In order to finish up my life coaching class successfully and focus on what kind of practice I want to build, I thought I needed to take things off my plate. I decided not to do the 5K training groups I had planned on starting. I decided not to do any sort of challenge. I decided not to advertise that I was looking for new clients. I decided to step back from planning the running group. I decided to stop outlining posts for this blog that I just didn’t have time to write. I decided to stop working toward a PR at the half I’m running next month.

My calendar looks great. I’m only working with three clients on a daily basis, and another monthly. That’s it. I’m laying an incredible foundation for my coaching practice. I’m super prepared for class and I’m getting tons of academic reading done. I’m working on a marketing strategy. I’m rebuilding my website. I have the time to commit to building my practice quicker and with the soul I want it to carry. I’m making really significant strides toward becoming a life coach. I’ve given myself the time to do this.

But taking things off my plate? It hasn’t led to any relief. If anything, I’ve grown more anxious. More disregulated. More exhausted. With less on my plate. It didn’t make any sense. (Nathan can attest to this – the poor guy.)

But I realized something this morning.

All these things I’ve cut out? All of these things I’ve stopped planning because I wanted to be all business-minded?

These are the things that gave me energy. These are the things that inspire me. These are the things that motivate me to keep working, to keep going, to keep growing.

So I’m not sure where I’m going from here. I’m not sure what I will be reintroducing and in what timeframe. What I do know is that I need to be fed. By people. By actual coaching work instead of the business piece only. My heart just isn’t in it when I’m not with people.

Also? I’m not in it when I’m not making the time to write about it.

My hope is that I will start writing here again. For me. Because I think through things right here in this space. This space gives me energy, gives me focus, gives me balance.

Just funny how what I thought was draining me was actually feeding me. Have you ever experienced something similar?